The Advocate Mom

. July 31, 2015.
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Kate Fineske resides in Sylvania with her husband Adam Fineske and their 3 Children: Elizabeth, age 12, Andrew, age 8, and Nicholas, age 5

Employed as the Assistant Executive Director of Mom-mentum, a national non-profit organization striving to engage mothers personally, enrich mothers professionally and empower mothers through public policy.
www.mom-mentum.org

What quality do you most admire in others?

Kindness. As I raise my own three children that’s what I want most for them. It’s a skill and characteristic that takes a lot of patience, love and self confidence to build, yet has the biggest ability to positively impact others in our community and across the globe.

What's your favorite childhood memory?

Family vacations. Our vacations were magical memories which I feel privileged to have experienced and hope to re-create in my own family. Every year my father would pack up our conversion van with enough shoes, clothes and accessories to outfit a small village, that’s what you get when you have three daughters and a wife with a fashion fetish, in search of a fun and affordable family vacation destination as a small break from the reality of the everyday grind.

What's your favorite food? 

Lasagna. Hands down.

Where is the best local place to take your kids? 

There are SO many! The Toledo Zoo, no wait… the library, especially the Main Library in downtown Toledo! We love to bike ride and explore all the different parks in the area too!

What's your super power? 

Understanding. I love the saying, “Be kind… everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.” I ALWAYS refer back to this quote when someone does something that makes me sad, disappointed or frustrated. Remembering this helps me to get through the more difficult moments in life with unheard of “superhero strength.”

What is your favorite movie? 

The most recent movie I’ve enjoyed, would be Maleficent. We tend to watch a lot of 80s movies on Netflix at home too— my all time favorite 80s movie is Goonies!

When you were younger, what did you want to be? 

I had a friend growing up that wanted to be the president of the United States and I was bound and determined to be her fashion designer. That lasted through Kindergarten. I no longer find fashion that intriguing, but love creativity.

What are your hobbies? 

Bike riding, traveling, and snuggling up with a good book.

What is the most important lesson in life you've learned so far? 

Never say never— ever. Motherhood has taught me that lesson over and over and over again!

What is your favorite family ritual? 

Getting up early. I typically get up around 5am, even when on vacation, and love the quietness of the morning.

What always makes you laugh? 

My children.

What do most people not know about you? 

I love music and had a college concentration, just short of a minor, in music performance. I’ve played the piano all my life and in college focused on the upright string bass with the University of Toledo’s Orchestra and Jazz Band.

What has surprised you the most about being a parent? 

Without a doubt, that there isn’t one correct answer to any parenting question and what works for one parent doesn’t always work for another. The pediatrician will tell you something different than the OBGYN, who will tell you something different than your friend, who is raising a plethora of amazing children, who will tell you something different from your mother, the lactation consultant and that amazing “solve-all-your-parenting-problems” book that everyone raves about. There is never ONE answer, just the solution that works best for you.

What is your favorite indulgence? 

Traveling.

Who do you admire most? 

My youngest who just turned 5. He has the freshest and most innocent outlook on everything… something that somehow gets lost and harder to maintain as youth disappears.

Early bird or night owl? 

Early bird.

If you could have dinner with anyone, who would it be? 

Oprah Winfrey. She intrigues me, and I would love to have a genuine conversation without cameras around.

What book would you recommend to other moms? 

Maxed Out: American Moms on the Brink. The book is by Katrina Alcorn, a happily married, mother of three with a thriving career, who shares a personal story of her own struggles to have both a career and a family while weaving in surprising research about the dysfunction between the careers and home lives of working mothers. The book made me cry, but also made me feel not so alone in my personal struggles to be a good mother while reaching for my own personal and professional goals.

What's your signature meal to make? 

I’m not much of a cook. In fact, my first response was that my signature meal was dinner at the Sundown Cantina, a nearby neighborhood restaurant favorite. After a little more thought, I realized that I make a pretty mean “Tossed Lasagna.” An easy rigatoni, meat and cheese casserole that (miraculously!) the whole family likes.

What is the best gift moms can give their children? 

Confidence. I’ve noticed when my children gain confidence, it is easier for them to be kind when others are not. It’s easier for them to make good choices because often the best choice is not the easiest choice. And overall, it’s easier for them to step outside of their comfort zone. The best things in life always come when one can step outside their own comfort zone. The best way I’ve found to instill confidence in my children is to try with all my might to model it myself.