A Tech-Free Vacation With Teenagers

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January 18, 2025

iphone taking picture of shore — Try limiting your teen's screen time for your next family vacation.

Last summer, my family went on a cruise that charged a fee for wi-fi on top of the extra fee charged by our phone plan. After much consideration, I decided not to purchase the wi-fi plan. As you can imagine, that did not go over well with my kids. There was a lot of grumbling and complaining, but I stood firm. For the entire week, no one in the family used cell phones.

I’ll admit that, at first, I felt some anxiety about my decision. Not having a cell phone plan or wi-fi would mean that I couldn’t text my kids and I would not have any connection to the rest of the world. Other than going “old school” with planning times to meet up, it turned out to be a wonderful experience.

We enjoyed our vacation in the present, without being distracted by electronic devices. It was worth it. At least for me.

This summer, our vacation destination came with free wi-fi. I considered restricting my kids’ phone use, but I decided to wait and see how they managed. Also, if I set restrictions, then I’d have to oversee the follow through and that would interfere with my goal of relaxing on vacation.

After the first full day, it became clear that my teens were unable to self-regulate. They were not interacting with the family and they were missing out on activities. With eyes glued to their screens, they were unaware of the beauty around them.

RELATED: Dealing With Alexa: The Other Teenager In My House

During that first day, I noticed other teens also glued to their electronic devices. One boy was typing on his phone as he was walking, unable to keep pace with the rest of his family. I heard his mom lose it. “Give me that damn phone right now!” she screamed. His mother was clearly upset and from her tone, it was not the first time she had to speak to him about it.

I struggled with finding a comprise for my own kids. Obviously, they wanted to use their phones without limits, but I believed they were missing out on our family vacation. I tried to see it from their point of view, thinking back to when I was a teenager and how I missed my friends when I was on family vacations. I know how important friends are to teens, so I wanted my kids to be able to maintain those connections while also being present for our vacation. Maybe, for them, vacation means using their phones whenever they want.

I discussed all of this with them and we agreed on a comprise. They could use their phones when they wanted, with the understanding that they would also try to participate in family activities. For the rest of our vacation they did limit their phone use, although there were still times when I needed to intervene or point out the amount of time they had been using their phone.

I’m not sure what the right answer is in this situation since I have nothing to compare it to. I didn’t have cell phones and electronic devices when I was growing up, so I’m learning how to manage problems as we go. But, honestly, the family cruise when we didn’t use our phones at all felt more like a vacation to me.

Right now, I’m considering planning another phone-free vacation for next year. Maybe one day my kids will look back and realize they were grateful for the times when they had to put their phones down and enjoy the scenery. A mom can hope, right?

Bio: Cheryl Maguire holds a Master of Counseling Psychology degree. She is married and is the mother of twins and a daughter. Her writing has been published in The New York Times, Parents Magazine, Upworthy, Chicken Soup for the Soul: Count Your Blessing and Your Teen Magazine. You can find her at Bluesky @CherylMaguire.

Local Authors Pen “Murray the Monster” Books

By

Julie Pompa

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January 17, 2025

2 women holding books — Sally Micsko and Alex Parquette (l-r) with their first book, "Murray the Monster"

“We’ve known since pre-school that we’d be doing something like this,” and the pandemic provided the means for Sally Micsko and her friend Alex Parquette to create a book series that appeals on several levels. Their two children’s books – Murray the Monster and Murray on the Move – celebrate self-love and the fact that everyone has value.

Two women on mountain — Writers/illustrators Sally Micsko and Alex Parquette (l-r).

Storytelling has always been a big part of Micsko’s and Parquette’s lives together. Growing up in Sylvania, they spent all their time together — in school and out. “We would always create little stories with each other,” explained Micsko, “and as we got older, we’d create raps.”

“Being creative is better with a friend by your side.”

“We always wanted to create books or something like that together,” Parquette agreed. “When the pandemic hit, we were able to find the time and resources as adults to make that happen.”

Working through their ‘lack of ability’

Once they graduated from Sylvania Southview, they continued their studies in different places – Micsko studied psychology and dance at Miami University of Ohio and Parquette studied public health and occupational therapy at The Ohio State University. While both had worked with children, neither had a sense for creating a children’s book. So, they jumped in (as writers and illustrators on both books) to come up with a character.

Parquette said, “Once we came up with a topic – self-love – and a name for our character – Murray – we needed to draw the people in the book. We decided that it didn’t need to be a person.”

RELATED: What’s on Our Bookshelf this January

Yellow book cover with purple monster hair on it — “Murray the Monster”

“Our lack of ability (in writing and illustration) inspired us to create Murray,” said Micsko. They settled on mental health as their general topic and created a monster (with the assistance of their iPad for design).

Parquette said that “insecurity is such a big part of life – for children and adults. You should be celebrating yourself.” So as Murray began to feel more secure about different parts of his appearance, his body would change from gray to full color.

“Just like Murray, you’re wonderful, inside and out.”

“We meshed together so well,” creating this book, said Micsko, it was very rewarding for them too. They began writing “Murray the Monster” in May 2020, and self-published on Amazon in November of that year.

Getting Murray active

The women’s careers distracted them a bit from their publishing work. They ultimately did return to Murray in 2023, with a second book focusing on getting him active. “Once we created the self-love and care theme for the first book, we thought it was time to focus on moving his body,” Parquette said. Micsko said they didn’t use the word “exercise” in the book. “We made it about movement and energy, and how great that is,” she said. “Murray on the Move” was published in November 2023.

Orange book cover with teal monster on it — “Murray on the Move”

“Murray was capable of doing so much: Jumping, and spinning, and skipping, and such.”

Both of the women’s families are in education and arranged for them to do readings of both books in their Sylvania classrooms, doing Zoom readings at first and then visiting the classrooms in person. They have also held book signings on a regular basis around the Toledo area. “I’m always so surprised by how many people come to our book signings,” Micsko said. “We are so thankful to have a great group of local fans.” They’ve also seen the books travel around the world, when teacher friends send them to friends and relatives in other countries.

What’s Murray up to next? “I’d love to do another book, something getting Murray out and doing more,” said Parquette. “Maybe doing holiday books, too,” said Micsko.

Winter Fun Photo Contest

By

Bailie Rinaldi

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January 15, 2025

Ask an Expert: Overwhelmed with Emotions

By

Ritu Pasrija

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January 14, 2025

Ritu Pasrija is the author and founder of Conscious Connections.

Dear local expert,

As a parent, I sometimes find myself overwhelmed with frustration or anxiety, especially when my child has a tantrum or gets upset over something small. How can I calm myself in these moments, and what are some practical ways I can help my child manage intense feelings of anger or sadness? I’m looking for strategies that are easy to implement when emotions are running high.

Sincerely,

Overwhelmed

Dear Overwhelmed,

My heart goes out to you — handling tantrums and intense emotions is no small task. The fact that you’re seeking guidance shows how deeply you care about your child. By calming yourself first, you create the space to respond thoughtfully and guide your child toward growth.

What You Can Do

Pause and Regroup
When emotions are running high, take a moment to disconnect from the situation. Calmly tell your child, “Mommy needs a moment to calm down so I can help you.” This models self-care and shows them it’s okay to step back when emotions feel overwhelming. Once you’ve mastered this, you can begin to self-regulate and co-regulate together.

Get Curious About the Behavior
Tantrums are often a sign of unmet needs or overwhelming emotions. Instead of reacting to the behavior itself, get curious. Ask yourself, “What might they need right now? Are they tired, hungry, frustrated or seeking connection?” Approach the situation without judgment, seeing beyond the behavior to understand the root cause. This shift in mindset fosters compassion and helps you address the actual need rather than just the reaction.

Self-Regulate
When you’ve stepped away, focus on calming your nervous system. Deep belly breathing works wonders — inhale fully and exhale longer to signal relaxation to your body. You can also visualize releasing stress, like blowing up a balloon with your thoughts and releasing as you watch it float away. Gentle movement, like stretching or pacing, can also help release pent-up energy.

Co-Regulate with Your Child
Once you’re calmer, invite your child to join you in calming down. For example, say, “Mommy needs a moment. Would you like to take a few breaths with me?” Whether or not they participate, seeing you self-regulate teaches them how to manage their own emotions. Your engagement should be warm and responsive. Co-regulation is a powerful way to guide them toward emotional stability while reinforcing connection.

Daily Calming Rituals

To prevent burnout for both you and your child, incorporate fun, calming rituals into your day. These might include:

Morning stretches or giggle together, even for just three minutes.
Quiet reading time, either alone or together.
Hugging moments — touch is incredibly soothing.
Evening gratitude reflections or spending time in nature, discovering and connecting with each other

These small moments of mindfulness and connection help regulate emotions proactively, making it easier to handle challenges when they arise.

Connect Before Correct

After regaining your calm, focus on connection. Lower yourself to their eye level and validate their feelings: “I see you’re really upset. Can you tell me what’s wrong?” Avoid minimizing their emotions — be empathetic and let them feel you understand.

Boundaries are important. If your child is hitting another child, address it with calm authority:

“It’s not okay to hit others. Hitting hurts. Try using your words.”
Then, offer a choice: “You can calm down on your own, or we can calm down together.” This sets a clear boundary while giving them autonomy and teaching emotional regulation.

Bringing it together

By recognizing tantrums as signals of unmet needs, you can approach them with curiosity and compassion rather than judgment. When you combine this understanding with self-regulation and co-regulation, you teach your child healthy coping mechanisms while creating an environment of safety and trust. Parenting isn’t about perfection — it’s about progress. Take it one step at a time.

If you’re still struggling, consider reaching out to a support group or seeking professional help. And please let us know how you’re doing! Wishing you the best on your parenting journey!

Warmly,

Ritu

RELATED: Ask an Expert: Frustrated About Screen Time

To ask a expert a question to be answered anonymously on Toledo Parent, send your question to [email protected].

Toledo Families Share the Impact of Assistance Dogs

By

Penny Tullis Meeker

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January 11, 2025

Boy cuddling with dog — Devin cuddling with his service dog, Sarah.

Having an assistance dog can change someone’s life for the better. While all assistance dogs can be impactful, there is a difference between service, companion and school facility dogs.

Service dogs are trained to help people with disabilities live more independently. The training includes meeting specific needs including pushing service buttons, picking up items, opening cupboard and refrigerator doors, counterbalancing an individual while walking and tugging off clothing.

Companion dogs provide support for children and adults with developmental disabilities. They help improve speech, coordination and social skills.

School Facility dogs comfort students in a counseling setting, improve motivation, and social skills.

The Ability Center’s Assistance Dogs Program helps connect eligible people with assistance dogs.

Devin and Nathan are two local individuals with autism who each received a companion dog from The Ability Center. The families of both boys are extremely pleased and grateful to be working with The Ability Center, which provides ongoing support. While each boy took some time to be connected with the right dog, they both shared that it was worth it.

“Sarah saved our son’s life”

Renee Palacios’ son Devin has an autism diagnosis. His autism manifests as a sensory processing disorder, which causes him to run away when there is a lot going on in his environment, including noise or large numbers of people.

Palacios recalls a day in 2016 that she will never forget. As her family headed out of church, with the band still playing and large numbers of people gathered, her son took off through the crowd and headed into a busy street. Renee had to lunge into traffic to get him, nearly injuring them both.

“At that time I thought, ‘there’s got to be a better way’. There’s got to be something to help this kiddo so he doesn’t freak out and run when he’s overstimulated,” she said.

Sarah, half golden retriever, half lab, became Devin’s companion dog after a 2 1/2 year wait. Now when Devin feels anxious, Sarah is trained to physically lay on him and lick him on the face. She distracts and calms him enough that he doesn’t run away anymore.

The community of Blissfield, where Devin lives, has embraced Sarah and bridged connections for Devin. Devin often comes home from school and talks to Sarah in his room for an hour about his day, which helps relieve his anxiety concerning the challenging environment of school.

“Potter is a Family Member”

Nathan, also diagnosed with autism, met Lewis, an assistance dog that his uncle fostered. Volunteers foster assistance dogs while they are being trained and waiting for a match to their person. When Nathan, 3 years old at the time, met Lewis, Nathan began chewing a sock. Nathan’s uncle laughed and said that Lewis likes to chew socks too. Nathan handed his sock to Lewis to chew. Lewis dropped the sock immediately, on the uncle’s command.

Boy in car with dog — Nathan riding in the car with his service dog, Potter.

“It was such a cool experience to see my son with a dog, and just to see how well behaved he (the dog) was with my son, and then also how well he (the dog) listened to my uncle.”

After waiting for 3 ½ years and meeting several dogs, Potter, a yellow lab mix, was matched with Nathan through The Ability Center. Dana had concerns about bringing Potter into the home because Nathan vocalizes when he is happy, singing, dancing and emitting happy squeals.

“Potter got to experience that (Nathan’s vocalizing), and he did great. He didn’t falter,” Dana said.

Though Nathan doesn’t normally fight, in the dentist’s chair, he would scream, hit, bite and try to get out.

“With Potter, Nathan actually sits in the examining chair. … Potter just puts his head on (Nathan’s) lap…, she (the dental hygienist) said, ‘Oh my gosh, if people aren’t believers of what these dogs can do, this will make you a believer’.”

Simply by holding the handle on Potter’s vest or leash reduces Nathan’s anxiety and outbursts, especially in public. Dana no longer must leave full grocery carts before checking out because Nathan becomes upset. And she can now finish every time she starts cutting his hair.

Potter has also bonded with the family’s other son, Nathan’s brother Zach, who also has autism.

Dana explains, “What I didn’t expect was that Potter would be a two for one, because my other son (Zach) has also become very close to Potter… Nathan can’t take care of Potter, but my older son Zach can, and (that caring) is something that brings him a lot of comfort, caring for Potter and being able to snuggle with him”

Winter Family Fun in Toledo

By

Kim Krieger

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January 10, 2025

Family holding toboggan sleds — Take a ride on the “winter roller coaster” at Pokagon State Park in northeast Indiana. Photo Courtesy of Pokagon State Park Facebook page.

Make lasting memories this winter as you explore the great outdoors with your family and friends! From hiking, ice-skating and sledding to snow tubing, skiing or riding down a “winter roller coaster,” you’ll find more winter activities in the region than you ever thought possible! Bundle up and get ready to enjoy snow season in the Midwest!

Ice-skating

Ottawa Park Ice Rink

Whether you you’re looking for a romantic skate date, an afternoon of skating with the family or a place to play hokey, the Ottawa Park Ice Rink is a great place for family fun this winter! The lighted ice-skating rink offers open skating periods, hockey leagues and tournaments. There are also skating classes for beginners and free youth hockey clinics. The indoor Rink Café is a great place to take a break, rent skates, or have your skates sharpened.

2015 Parkside Dr., Toledo, Ohio 43606 419-936-2875

Metroparks Toledo skating

Kids and adults ice skating — The Ribbon is a one-of-a-kind skating experience in Toledo! Photo Courtesy of Metroparks Toledo Facebook.

The Ribbon ice skating trail at Glass City Metropark is a 1,000-foot loop trail offering families a one-of-a-kind winter ice skating experience. The Ribbon is connected to a 5,000 square foot skating pond that offers a traditional ice rink experience for beginners. Special events and programs are also offered throughout the winter. Skate rental is available, and reservations are required.

Families are also welcome to skate on the natural ponds and lake at several Metroparks. Ice skating in natural areas is “at your own risk” and is only available when ice is at least six inches thick. Mallard Lake at Oak Openings Preserve offers daytime ice-skating. Lights have been added near the lake at Pearson Park allowing families an option to continue skating once the sun sets!

RELATED: Where to go Ice Skating in Toledo

Toboggan run

Take a ride on the “winter roller coaster” at Pokagon State Park in northeast Indiana, less than 2 hours from the Toledo area. The park’s toboggan run is a quarter mile of dips and valleys with a total vertical drop of 90 feet. The top recorded speed on the 30 second thrill ride is 42 mph! Race down the refrigerated twin tracks for a day of fun adventures – with no snow needed! Only $9 per car to enter the park and toboggans are $20 per hour. The toboggan run is open Saturday and Sunday through February 23 (extended hours during winter break, Martin Luther King, Jr. Day and President’s Day)

Pokagon State Park, 450 Lane 100 Lake James, Angola, IN 46703. 260-833-2012

Cross country skiing and snowshoeing

The Metroparks offer miles of natural area to explore on skis this winter. All unpaved trails and open playfields in the Metroparks are suitable for cross-country skiing during daylight hours. Secor Metropark and Oak Openings Preserve also offer cross-country ski trails that are groomed and waiting to be explored (once it snows!) Learn more online!

Family snow shoeing — Snowshoeing is another great way to enjoy the great outdoors this winter. Photo Courtesy of Metroparks Toledo Facebook.

Snowshoeing is another great way to enjoy the great outdoors this winter! The walking trails and open fields at the Metroparks are available for snowshoeing and “pop up” events are often offered throughout the winter – a great way enjoy a snowshoeing adventure! Sign-up for on the email list to be notified of a pop-up event and the chance to register! Learn more and sign-up online.

Winter Hiking

A winter nature hike is a great opportunity for kids to get an up-close look at the changing of the season. Bundle up and head to Maumee Bay State Park or one of the many Metroparks in the Toledo area to enjoy a peaceful stroll through a winter wonderland! Trails of varying lengths and surfaces are available throughout northwest Ohio.

The Metroparks are also offering several hiking events throughout the winter including Toddler Trails, Winter Woods Mindfulness Night Hike, Full Moon Hike, Family Fun on the Trail and Wintering the Metroparks. To learn more or register for a winter hiking event visit the Metroparks event/ticket page.

Sledding

Gliding down a hill of freshly fallen snow is a favorite winter activity for all ages! Despite the flat terrain of northwest Ohio, there are plenty of perfect sledding hills throughout the region. If you’re looking for a great sledding spot, check out the following hills:

Metroparks Toledo: Some of the most popular spots can be found at Blue Creek, Side Cut, Pearson, and Glass City Metroparks. Learn more online!
Northview High School – 5403 Silica Dr., Sylvania, Ohio
Sylvania Prairie Park – 8601 Brint Rd., Sylvania, Ohio
Ottawa Park – 2532 Upton Ave., Toledo, Ohio
Maumee Bay State Park – 1400 State Park Rd., Oregon parks. Learn more!
Homecoming Park – 715 Lawrence Ave., Wauseon, Ohio

Downhill Skiing, Snowboarding or Tubing

Family tubing in snow — Snow tubing is an amazing winter adventure for all ages to enjoy together! Photo Courtesy of Snow Trails Facebook page.

Looking to hit the slopes this winter? Consider a short drive to Mt. Brighton for a cool skiing or snowboarding adventure. While the hills and snow may be man-made, the fun is real at this nearby ski resort. To learn more about hours, lift tickets rentals, and events visit the Mt. Brighton website.

4141 Bauer Rd, Brighton, MI, United States, Michigan (810) 229-9581

If you’re not an avid skier but still up for a downhill adventure, consider a trip to Snow Trails in Mansfield – a premier destination in Ohio for skiing, snowboarding and snow tubing. Snow tubing is an amazing winter adventure for all ages, with no experience necessary!

Snow Trails, 3100 Possum Run Road, Mansfield, Ohio 44903 (419) 774-9819

Family Arctic Overnight

If you’d prefer some winter-themed indoor fun, consider making reservations for a Family Arctic Overnight adventure at the Toledo Zoo! Families can sleep in the Artic Encounter building surrounded by the polar bear, seal and sea lion exhibits! This special event also includes an opportunity to meet and greet touchable animals, learn animal care from zookeepers, take a night hike to view nocturnal animals, and enjoy a pizza dinner and light breakfast. The program runs from Friday, January 17 at 6:30 p.m. to Saturday, January 18 at 10 a.m., by reservation only.