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Helping Teens Create New Years Resolutions

Phot from Unsplash by Kelly Sikkema.

January offers a clean slate and a new year of possibilities. Teens (and their adults) may take this time to set new goals and resolutions for the days ahead. While many of us are making exercise and diet a priority (I’m looking at you, holiday cookies!), there are many other self-improvement goals that are worthy and achievable.

“As human beings, setting milestones, achieving goals and visioning for yourself is a skill we need for a lifetime. I think it’s really important for kids to learn how to set goals, things that are achievable for them that move them forward,” said Philip D. Atkins, PhD, LICDC-CS, OCPC. Atkins is the Chief Care Coordinator Officer at Harbor of Toledo.

See more, hear more, feel more, do more

“I think the first thing we need to start with is a common vision. We use a really cool technique out of the Paxis Institute. It’s developing a unified vision of things we want to see more of, hear more of, feel more of and do more of. And then things we want to see less of, hear less of, feel less of, and do less of,” Atkins said.

Philip D. Atkins, PhD, is the Chief Care Coordinator Officer at Harbor of Toledo.

“If you are a parent working with your teen, that’s a really good place to start,” Atkins said. “Let’s talk about this year. Let’s focus on something about school. If we were having the best school year ever, what would that be? Get to know what your teen envisions for themselves. That gets to the positive as well as things that we want to change.”

A plan for success

Atkins offered some tips for parents and teens who are looking for ways to make the new year the best it can be.

Make goals small and specific:

“Make goals that are not just about improvement, but about attainment,” Atkins said. 

Break down goals for the month, the week, the day:

“Kids, and teens especially,  are very here and now. You have to make things that are super attainable,” Atkins said. 

Keep it small:

“Make goals that are not just about improvement but about attainment,” Atkins said. 

Keep it positive:

“I always like to say that we have to have five positive reinforcers for every one negative. If you water the weeds in your garden, you’re going to get more weeds. If you water the flowers, you are going to get more flowers. We want fewer weeds and more flowers,” Atkins said. 

Praise:

“That’s just how kids work. We can celebrate and reward, not just with things, but with praise. Success really builds off success,” Atkins said. 

Keep it fun:

“Kids are used to games. There’s a lot of brain science around the gamification of goals. Offer tokens for more screen time, or dollars for a homecoming dress,” Atkins said. 

Reward:

“Sometimes, the things that kids want are really simple. It’s great for us to clue into those things, like family rituals that are very important, such as a game night or Taco Tuesday. Those become the fun rewards,” Atkins said. 

Celebrate:

“A year for a teen is practically a lifetime. We’re in a very real time world now. There have to be achievable milestones along the way that we stop and celebrate,” Atkins said. 

Review: 

“You had a great month. What did that look like?”

“Don’t get too caught up in January. We put a lot of stock in January being different. But guess what?  It’s winter, it’s dark. That is the last time I want to give up Mac and Cheese. There is nothing magical about January, but there is magic in helping your kid identify that vision,” Atkins said. 

The Dawn of a New Era of Maturity: Supporting Our Growing Teen

Two people watching something on a laptop.
Photo from Pexels.

It starts with an eye roll, a slammed door, muttering under their breath as they stomp away, and you wonder when your sweet child became a teenager, but wait, they’re only preadolescent, just a tween. We aren’t there yet. Almost everything about puberty has changed since today’s adults went through the awkward phase, and many of us weren’t adequately warned or advised on the basics we would experience. Now, the topic of puberty and maturation is more complex, not forgetting all the things kids have now that didn’t exist when we were at that stage. 

Once upon a time, it was standard that between the ages of 10 and 14, we would notice changes in our bodies. We would go through this awkwardness for three to four years. However, recent research  suggests that puberty is now starting at age 8-9 for girls and 9-10 for boys and lasts up to a decade! For females, researchers note periods stayed roughly the same, with just the marked physical changes starting earlier.  It’s also stated that puberty and adolescence overlap, causing our children to experience social, emotional, and physical shifts to all co-exist.

Fear not if your child is a little older than this and you haven’t had this discussion with them yet. It’s never too late, and everything is different for everyone. 


What to look out for in your child

To be clear, there is not one thing to look out for, but if you’re asking yourself why your younger child is acting like a teenager, it might be time to start the conversation. What happens when? No one knows.

We do know and see our children experiencing big feelings, and they all have them about where they fall on the spectrum compared to their peers. You might notice your 3rd or 5th graders, boys especially, starting to hide their bodies and becoming quiet. It’s time to check with your pediatrician.

When did high schoolers become so tall? Weight, height, curves, hair and physical dimensions show earlier and are more pronounced even by middle school, but especially by high school compared to today’s adults. I remember it taking until the eleventh grade before I noticed any fundamental changes, such as that at 5’11, I was towering over my classmates, but walking through the halls of high school today, I am looking up. 


How we as parents can guide and support them

This aspect is a lot harder for parents today, with the influence of social media on body image for girls and boys. You can space out conversations without dumping too much information on them because not everything will happen overnight. Explain what’s happening to their body in simple terms, noting that while they act much older, keep things appropriate for their true age. Please do what you can to boost their self-esteem, focusing on activities and grades rather than body.

Keep lines of communication open and encourage them to speak freely. Don’t falsely reassure them that everything will be fine or that there will be a day they won’t even remember all of this. It’s important not to diminish any feelings our children might have since this is a big deal to them. 

As always recommended, talk with your child’s pediatrician and follow the guidelines provided. 

RELATED: Why Parenting Teenagers Wears Me The Heck Out

How Local Schools Handle Cell Phone Usage

Photo from Pexels.

Chrome books. Cell phones. Smart watches. Most of us seem to be plugged in twenty four hours a day. But there are times when it is important to unplug from all the technology.

Area schools have policies and guidelines in place for the use of technological devices, both for students and for teachers.

Emma Zielinski, an eighth grade student at Toledo School for the Arts, follows the school’s protocol when it comes to cell phone usage. Her experience is pretty typical for most local teens. As. “We can have cell phones out if we are not in class, but when we are in class, they have to be in our book bag or in a pocket,” she said. Zielinski adds that she has no problem with the policy, and she isn’t tempted to check her phone.

Taking a break from the screen

Local school districts have policies in place regarding technology usage, with guidelines clearly spelled out in student handbooks. As new technologies emerge, such as ChatGPT, the policies are explored,  re-examined and modified.

Cell Phone Usage

When it comes to cell phones, Sylvania Schools leaves some of those decisions up to the classroom teacher.  “Our policy does not allow students to have cell phones out while in class. However, the policy provides for teacher discretion (in certain situations). Cell phones are not collected throughout the day” Amy Addington, communications coordinator for Sylvania Schools, explained.

Addington believes that teachers support the limited usage for many reasons. “One junior high staff member said, ‘I feel strongly that taking a break from (mobile phones) during the school day is a net positive for children.’ Another teacher shared ‘By limiting the use of cell phones throughout the day, we have seen a reduction in the number of social media incidents that negatively impact the school day.”

No distractions, no disruptions

At Perrysburg Schools, policies are clearly spelled out in the student handbook. Electronic devices may be used before and after school, during after school activities and at school-related functions, as long as they do not create a distraction to others, disrupt the lessons or otherwise interfere with the educational environment.

High school students are given a bit more leeway, as they are permitted to use their devices on lunch breaks and between classes. However, ringers must be turned off at all times and students are not permitted to talk on their phones at that time. Headphones are also encouraged to keep devices inaudible during the school day. 

Approved educational devices may be used throughout the day. Other devices must be powered off completely and stored out of sight during class time. 

A graduated approach 

Maumee City Schools have adopted a graduated approach to cell phones and devices based on grade levels. 

Elementary students are not permitted to use cell phones or devices in the building during school hours, with the expectation that students have devices turned off and stored prior to entering the building. There may be times when teachers allow an electronic device to be used for educational purposes, but that is at the discretion of the staff. Students who do not follow this rule risk having their electronic devices confiscated. 

Middle school students must store their devices in their lockers, and may not use headphones or earbuds in classrooms or hallways. 

High school students are expected to place their cell phones in caddies hanging on the wall of each classroom. Cell phones are not permitted in bathrooms. Cell phone, headphones, and earbud usage in the classroom are permitted when allowed by the teacher. 

As a safeguard, all Maumee City School students are required to use Aruba Public wifi network. 

Protecting the educational environment

Toledo Public Schools (TPS) abides by regulations put in place by the school board, while allowing for some variations, depending on the needs of specific schools and classrooms.

“The board policy just wants to make sure that cell phones, and use of cell phones, whether it is students or staff, do not create a disruption to the educational environment,” Brian Murphy, Chief of Strategy and Organizational Development for Toledo Public Schools, said, adding, “In the district, whether it is elementary schools or high schools, students can use cell phones during their lunch, in the hallways between classes and before and after school. In the classroom, it’s really at the discretion of the teacher. Our regulation around that is that it still has to be used for educational purposes, and teachers have discretion in that (determination),” he said.

Some TPS classrooms and schools have begun collecting cell phones and putting them in “time out” during the school day.  “Every school has a different culture and a different climate,” Murphy said. “We do allow schools to do some other program or initiative. For example, we have an elementary school that collects all the cell phones when the kids walk into the door, and the kids do not have those cell phones returned until the end of the school day.”

Emma Zielinski is an eighth grade student at Toledo School for the Arts.

“As a district, we have been researching programs across the state and across the country. We are seeing some success, and we are having discussions about whether (holding of cell phones during the school day) is something we want to do moving forward as a school district,” Murphy said. “In some of our schools, we allow teachers, as long as they get approval from the administration, to (hold student phones),” he added. “We have one specific high school that has a lot of teachers doing that this year.”

Murphy said that teachers and staff try to encourage students to follow the regulations before a problem arises.  “We can confiscate the cell phone if it becomes an educational disruption. We know that almost all kids have cell phones, and sometimes the phones can be disruptive,” he said.

Toledo Public Schools continues to research other methods and policies regarding cell phones that could be implemented in future school years.

RELATED: Generative AI and Teens: What Parents Should Know

Wood County’s Developmental Disabilities Triumph: A $2.45 Million Renewal Levy

Photo from @woodcountydd on Instagram of a recent game between the Wildcats and the WCBDD staff.

In a resounding victory for Ohio’s Wood County, a $2.45 million renewal levy recently passed with a notable 65% to 35% margin. The success of this initiative marks a significant milestone for the Wood County Board of Developmental Disabilities, renewing hope and support within the community. 

Understanding the margin: a closer look at the levy’s success

The margin of victory, with 29,622 votes in favor and 15,949 against, represents a substantial win for the developmental disabilities community.

Superintendent of the Wood County Board of Developmental Disabilities Brent Baer clarifies this, explaining, “It passed by just under 14,000 votes.” Examining historical voter turnout, Baer notes that the roughly 45,000 voters in Wood County participating in the election align with past trends. “We’re certainly very appreciative of the support that the voters of Wood County have given us.”

With the levy’s renewal, the Wood County Board of Developmental Disabilities aims to navigate the challenges posed by a significant increase in service requests over the last decade.

“We are 44% larger than the number of individuals enrolled in services in 2023 compared to 2013,” Baer said.

Notably, the enrollment for children aged 0 to 21 has experienced a remarkable growth of 56%, reflecting both an increase in cases and an enhanced acceptance of seeking help. The board actively responds to these shifts by expanding staff, avoiding waiting lists, and ensuring families receive timely support.

Fostering inclusivity and community involvement

The benefits of the levy renewal extend beyond the developmental disabilities community, positively impacting the entire Wood County community.

“It will benefit everyone. The more inclusive and aware our communities are, the easier it is for us to grow and prosper together,” Baer said.

The board actively seeks partnerships and collaborations with external entities, aiming to be an integral part of the greater community rather than a small segment.

Reflecting on the community’s evolution, Baer discussed the increased inclusivity in events like tractor pulls and art fairs. Baer noted the unique support from the National Tractor Pulls group, emphasizing their welcoming atmosphere.

“As families continue to reach out to us, they truly appreciate being from a community that welcomes them with open arms,” he said.

Getting involved: opportunities for engagement

For those looking to get involved, Baer suggests exploring the numerous events hosted by the Wood County Board of Developmental Disabilities. The annual June Firefly Nights community festival stands out. It features products and artwork created by individuals receiving services from Wood County. There are volunteer opportunities abound, including engagement with service clubs, Special Olympics and recreational programs.

Communications Coordinator Charese Botjer said, “Speaking about inclusivity in other areas, our recreation and wellness program strives to provide experiences and opportunities for individuals, not just within Wood County but beyond.”

The program actively engages individuals in outings and experiences, fostering transferable skills and introducing them to new communities.

A collaborative future: parks and beyond

Baer highlights collaborative projects like Wood County Plays, a partnership with the city of Perrysburg, which contributes to developing an inclusive park called Rotary Park.

“Regardless of where you live, you can help our system grow in a way that truly meets the needs of the greater community,” Baer said. The impact extends further as Perrysburg city council allocated funds to enhance the accessibility of other parks, creating a ripple effect that positively influences neighboring communities.

In closing, the Wood County Board of Developmental Disabilities expresses deep gratitude for the community’s ongoing support. The renewal levy’s success not only secures the current services for the developmental disabilities community but also sets the stage for inclusive growth and collaboration across Wood County. As the community continues to evolve, the board remains dedicated to its mission, fostering a spirit of acceptance, inclusivity, and teamwork that benefits all residents.

RELATED: Disability Friendly Toledo: A Resource Guide

Wiggle Wednesday December Event Photos